Monday, September 28, 2020

Paint It Black

In the 9th grade I had a lot of feelings . I was completely struck by this new music that I had discovered. It was Taking Back Sunday, and The Used, and Panic! at the Disco , and Coheed and Cambria and I was completely sure that I was the only person who truly felt all of these deep feelings that I would one day feel in a studio apartment in New York City, probably smoking cigarettes out my window with my chipped black fingernails. I wore black on black to school every day, I listened to my walkman (yes, you read that right, my WALKMAN) as I travelled from class to class and I kid you not when someone asked me what I was listening to I told them "You've never heard of them." Man oh man!

That all eventually faded as I navigated into young adulthood and whatever you would call the stage I'm into now. It's held on through my continued love of punk and rock music (please insert rock and roll emoji hand here), my appreciation of a leather jacket (and biker boots if you've got 'em), and my adoration of all things Halloween. There's still a spooky emo girl inside me somewhere.

When it came time to move to our new house I couldn't get the idea of black statement walls or black french doors out of my head. I just wanted to paint it freaking black. 

It took a heck of a lot of convincing but I did eventually get Jordan to sway over to my side and agree to hand me a paint brush and let me go wild. It helped that we had painted a mantle and our wetbar black and Jordan really liked it (don't worry- I'll be showing you every inch of this house and all the things I goth-ed out but that's not for today).

I started with painting a statement wall in our bedroom black. It was honestly so fun to do! I made a playlist of all of my favourite emo songs from my youth and let the 14 year old me live her dreams henny! Now, again, that's a tour for another day.

Painting our bedroom wall black and doing a good job at it gave me free reign over the rest of the house with my charcoal dipped brush!

I had my eyes set on the back of our front door. That's right- the back! I've always wanted to infuse a space with a pop of colour on the back of a door- or, if you will, a pop of an absence of colour.

Here's what the back of the door looked like before:


Nothing horrible or awful- but was it helping my live out my wildest emo dreams? No no no.

And I present to you the door now:


Ain't she cute!?

And my apologies for the lighting on the door- yah girl is still learning her way around a camera and is having a heck of a time figuring out how to take pictures of walls with windows on them without bleaching out the window or covering the rest of the shot in complete darkeness. It's a process.

As consolation for the learning curve I will award you with one tour of my front entrance. I know you wanted to see them deets!


If you would have told me a year ago that I'd be sitting around thinking about a cute way to store our face mask collection I would have laughed in your face. 2020 is a trip my friends!

Previously I've never liked a house that was a split (to be honest we don't know how to define our house- side split? Front split? Raised something or other?) but I really haven't minded it with this house. The front door walks into a sizable landing and I've enjoyed decorating this little entrance of ours. The other bonus is that under the stairs is a crawl space which has been great for storing things we want to keep out of the way and organized in bins. I also enjoy the fact that the stairs are only a half flight because I've already fallen down a set. It was traumatic.

So there's the front entrance of our home. It has come a long way from it's wallpaper-ed beginnings and feels like a calm and beautiful introduction to our home. 

Can't wait to share more of our home with you- oh and more tales of my delusional adolescent thoughts- that's probably what you come here for too! 


From the desk of:

Taylor Brown
Feeler of Very Serious Feelings since 2005 








Friday, September 18, 2020

I Said Hey, What's Going On?

 

<<Just me cosplaying as the girl who works at the fashion magazine but doesn't take it seriously because she wants to write real stories about war-torn countries and starving children>>

Hey y'all!

Things have been b-u-s-y busy around here!

Our house is in a perpetual state of chaos because we're renovating. We got the house in June and had plans to have the whole place painted, torn up and put back together before we moved in in July but unfortunately our contractor broke his leg so we had to wait until mid-September for him. We were able to get all of the wallpaper taken down and the entire house painted before we did move in and that made a huge difference. We also changed all the light fixtures, had some pot lights installed and changed some other fixtures along the way. The kitchen is now getting the finishing touches today and the bathroom is completely demolished and should be finished within the next couple weeks. It's definitely been a process living amongst projects and renovations all this time but it's also been super fun. We really decided to go for it with this house. Our last house was an income property so when we did make any changes they all had to be neutral and with renters in mind. This house is all ours! That means I've finally been making the renovation decisions I've dreamed of (can you say blue kitchen!?) Don't worry I'll be showing you every last detail here. I'm just so dang smitten with it! 

Now that I'm back to blogging I'm so excited to share all of the things we've been up to around here. I started taking some pictures on my iphone of some of our upgrades and quickly realized that my iphone is just not up to snuff. Then I pulled out my canon and it didn't have a memory card (face palm). That's been the delay here. I've finally found my memory card and I'm going to work on getting some pictures taken this weekend. 

Things I'm hoping to share in the next little bit:

- Fireplace facelift (this one blew my mind)

- Upgrading our bar (how adult are we!? a bar!)

- Painting the wall in our bedroom black (hi, my 9th grade emo dreams came true)

- Painting the back of our front door (a long held dream of mine)

- Adding hanging plants to our dining room (Jordan has expressed hatred towards this but he is wrong)

- The kitchen remodel (oof this is going to be a big one)

-Eventually our bathroom remodel

- The honeycomb shelves I'm building (these have really stalled but I have every hope to work on those this weekend!)

There has been so much going on here lately and it's all be wonderful and hectic and busy as heck!

Can't wait to share it all!

From the desk of:

Taylor Brown
Joanna Gaines in Training 


Saturday, September 5, 2020

Books of 2019

Well, this is awkward, isn't it?

I mean I usually get this annual book review out in January and here we are in September...but I mean it hasn't really been a banner year for things going as planned now has it?

I'm gonna go ahead and give myself some grace. 9 months of grace to be exact. A gestation of grace, if you will- except at the end there ain't no baby here, just a (late) 20-something's small spark of literary joy. Did I take this metaphor too far?

Anywho!

This year was a good year for books. I found some new loves. Re-read some old loves and learned a heck of a lot in between.

So let's get to it, shall we?



1. White Oleander- Janet Finch

White Oleander is truly an old love. I first read this book in high school and this was probably my 4th or 5th re-read. It's just so dang beautiful. It's a fictional story about a girl (Astrid) who lives with her mother (Ingrid)- a woman she thinks is pure perfection. When Ingrid is scorned by one of her lovers she murders the man sending Astrid into the LA foster care system. Each home she stays in is like a completely different world that teaches and takes new and different things from Astrid.

This book is one of my absolute favourites and in my humble opinion, perfectly written. 10/10 will reach again (and again, and again).



This was probably my funnest read of the year. Nobody Cares is a book of essays and my favourite part of it was that it was written by a woman from my hometown, who even went to my highschool! (At different times than me though). Her essays are legitimately hilarious and incredibly relatable as a young adult just trying to figure it the eff out.

Of course the shining star of the book was her essay on my hometown. It gave me all the feels and was perfectly acturate. You don't need to be from Hespeler to love it though. it's genuinely a fun read!



3. Homebody- Joanna Gaines

I know this is a coffee table book but boy, did it have a lot of text. It therefore has earned the right to be on this list.

Of course this book was b-e-a-utiful, like everything by my lord and saviour, Joanna Gaines.

I'm pretty sure Jordan got completely annoyed with me every night when I would interupt his reading to show him a living room that he most definitely did not care about. I'm sorry but it was justsoprettydontyouthinkweshoulddothistoo? Nuff said.



4. Stranger in the Woods- Michael Finkle

Hi. This book was crazy. And true. And just flipping fascinating.

Stranger in the Woods is about Christopher Knight who at twenty years old left his home, family and friends and just became a hermit in the Maine wilderness for almost 30 years. Eventually people got sick of him stealing supplies from their cabins so he was arrested but he was such a hermit that it took years for people to even catch him and they didn't even find his camp until HE SHOWED IT TO THEM.

It was a really interesting read about solitude and the actual positive effects that silence and nature can have on your intelligence. I still spout facts from this book at people even though I'm almost 1000% sure I don't remember them all correctly and am probably misinforming people daily.



5. Survivor- Chuck Palahniuk

Ah, another re-read. I believe in reading at least one Chuck Palahniuk book a year thankyouverymuch.

I don't even need to know what Chuck's books are about to buy them any more. That's the honest truth. Therefore I'm not going to describe this one to you at all. Pick up a Chuck Palahniuk book, any one. He's fantastic.


6. Educated- Tara Westover

Oof this book was a good one. This biography by Tara Westover told about her upbringing in a fanatical religious family who didn't believe in healthcare or education and was convinced the end days were always coming. Her parents put her in so much danger during her childhood and as she grew older she had to leave them behind to pursue what she wanted: an education. She ended up going to Harvard and Cambridge University but eventually has to deal with her family's abusive ways.

It's inspiring and heartbreaking and I can't recommend it enough.



I was very excited to read this one. I'd heard about it on a podcast and was immediately pulled in. Christian was a white supremacist and wrote about his life, how he got to that point and how he eventually overcame that harmful ideology and left the white supremacist movement. 

As much as I applaud his change of heart and mind and courage to leave all that he knew behind, I also did not feel that he took very much responsibility throughout the book. He tended to gloss over the racist thoughts and actions, never really examining them. It felt like he was writing a book about himself and then occasionally mentioning that he may have beaten someone up that night because of the colour of their skin. It just kind of felt like it missed the mark and more than explaining why he thought what he did he kind of justified it and glossed over it. I give this book a solid "ehhh".




I love a good relationship advice book and have followed Jeremy and Audrey on social media for a while. I like their approach to pursuing an exceptional relationship and their commitment to being intentional with their significant other. 

This book was their telling of their love story and some of their tips for how they love and honour each other. I enjoyed reading this (it was a super easy and quick read) but I do have some differing views from them when it comes to religion so reading some parts was a bit cringy for me. If anything it was an interesting anthropological look at American Christian relationships and that's all I'll say about that.



This was another quick, easy read. I honestly don't have too much to say about this. It's an advice book and you take from it what you want. 



I'm a huge My Favourite Murder Fan. I've listened and (re-listened) to every episode, I've re-told people my favourite episodes (sometimes to their dismay) and taken almost any recommendation Karen and Georgia throw my way.

This book was probably my most anticipated read of 2019 and it did not disappoint. It was a co-authored autobiography so it delved more into Karen and Georgia's lives, how they grew up, how they got into true crime and where they came up with so many of their philosophies that have now become catchphrases and  slogans that murderinos say, wear, and press onto their bumpers in the form of vinyl decals.

I loved reading this and will probably read anything Karen and Georgia write from now until forever.




This was a super interested read. Caitlin Doughty went around the world examining other countries relationship with death. It was definitely cool to see from the point of view of a society that tries to sanitize and hide death at every turn. There's one community she visited that has a ritual of retrieving their dead from their crypts, cleaning them, dressing them and spending time with them. It's their way of taking care of their dead and being close to them. Super fascinating.

Also in case anyone asks I most definitely want to go to a body farm when I die (look it up- true crime and the funeral industry meet!)

This book was a bit dry though, I will admit. As interesting as it was it was just a tad slow. If you're looking to read something by Caitlin I highly recommend "Smoke Gets In Your Eyes." That one blew.my.mind and was just super entertaining.


Okay- if you don't know about David Goggins please go read a synopsis about him. He's basically the world's toughest man and he can make you feel like a big whiny quitter who can also do anything they put their mind to. He's equal parts terrifying and encouraging like that.

This book is his story of how he went from 300 pounds and giving up on life to deciding to become a navy seal and then an ultramarathon runner. He is the toughest person I have ever heard of. While I wouldn't reccomend following all of his methods (he basically ran a 100 mile race without any training and stress fractured his foot, peed blood, almost shut down his kidney and also completely crapped himself) he also has a lot of good lessons that will inspire you to just freaking do it. Worth a read!



This was a fun, beach read that I went through quickly. It's a mystery along the lines of "Girl on the Train." This book won't blow your mind in most respects and can be a bit predicable, or in other cases unbelievable, it is a nice little mindless read to have fun with.


Jordan and I are Curb Your Enthusiasm fans so this book was an automatic yes to me. Jeff Garlin wrote a book about trying to lose weight and become eco-friendly. He was also filming Curb at the time and included lots of behind the scene facts which I just ate up (pun intended).

It was an interested read and taught me a lot about Jeff Garlin that I didn't know. He wrote the book in real time like a diary so that was a fun format. It's most definitely not a diet book, more of a autobiography about his struggles. Good read if you like him.



This was probably my favourite read of the year. From the Ashes is Jesse's story of being native in Canada, dealing with a childhood of struggle and neglect, becoming homeless and addicted to drugs and eventually getting sober and getting a phD. 

I'm incredibly interest in indigenous stories in Canada and really enjoyed this book. He broke down his childhood of connecting with his culture through his grandparents, then losing that living amongst addiction, then becoming an addict himself and dealing with becoming what people had always suggested he would be based on racism. His story was very enlightening and really got into the psyche of what it's like to be a First Nations person in Southern Ontario. 



I didn't really pay much attention to Chelsea Handler until she came out with her first Netflix special "Chelsea Does..." I generally found her rude and entertaining but there was a spark of activism in there during the episode "Chelsea Does...racism". Then she began to get really into politics and activism and had her Netflix talkshow. She seemed to really be trying to learn, and to learn with us by bringing scientists onto the show and explaining American politics. It was cool to see her evolving and then making sure we learned with her.

This book is all about her transformation. How she started going to therapy and started to examine how the death of her brother had effected her when she was a child. It was cool to see her vulnerability. I like this book and felt like it could teach us all a lot about changing who we are if we don't like it anymore. 


Well folks! That's the whole kit and caboodle. Another year of books have been reviewed. Maybe I should start writing next years book review now so I can at least get it out mid-year this time! I'm on my 15th book this year so there will be even more to review next year.

Hope you stay reading, friends!

From the desk of:

Taylor Brown
Bibliophile

 

Thursday, September 3, 2020

Where Yah Been, Bitch?

 


It's been a ding dang minute.

I was thinking about this blog recently and wasn't sure if I would just leave it to sit in the ether or if I would write again, or just delete it all-together. To be honest, I was leaning toward delete.

Then on a whim today I deleted instagram and tik tok (I'm sorry- I know I'm "too old"for it but I really do love it) and for some reason I just wanted to write in my blog- to get back to documenting this hum-drum life of mine.

Lately I've been trying to connect with myself a little more- to re-establish some independence that I may have lost in the warm and secure nest of being with another person for over 10 years. No, we aren't breaking up- let's just call it an "I-turned-29-last-week-and-had-a-realization-that-I-don't-do-nearly-enough-of-the-things-I-actually-want-to-do" epiphany. I hated going for walks alone because I felt strange just heading out my door without going for a jog or at least having a final destination in mind. I have all of these ideas for what I want to do to our house and never end up doing them because I've convinced myself that I just can't. 29 is the year I'm saying to hell with that. I've been walking every day and I bought some black paint and painted the wall behind our bed black (don't worry- I'll write a blog post about it). I'm taking an online course on indigenous studies and even one on the science of happiness. I'm reading and learning about vegetarianism (yup, I'm a proud af vegetarian now) and anti-racism. These things make me feel happy- much happier than scrolling through instagram (even though I truly do get great ideas for interior decorating, or learn about minimalism, and vegetarianism, and being eco-friendly) or tik tok (even though it's just freaking fun to watch). 

2020 has been a literal shit show but I've also learned a lot this year. I actually found quite a bit of joi de vivre inside of quarantine, through going for walks and having free time and just enjoying simple, simple things. I'm grasping on to that more and more now that I'm back in the office and life is starting to seem more normal. 

I used to hear people say they were working on themselves and think it was such a strange idea- like how does one work on themselves? Just change the way you act- duh. But as I'm stumbling further and further into adulthood I'm realizing that I spend a hell of a lot of time working on myself and it's freaking hard to change and be better but I'm working on it. I'm going to therapy, and I'm reading and I'm reflecting on things and it's cool and awful and enlightening all at once. 

All of this to say- I'm working on being one of those people that I always wanted to be. I'm going to nourish myself with hobbies and interests and experiences. I'm going to create and learn and take in new information and experiences. So I'll be here. I still have my annual book review to complete (9 months too late but hey!). 

Hope you follow along and enjoy this new journey!

From the desk of:

Taylor Brown
The Comeback Kid